I was driving to Newark Penn Station to drop my daughter off at the Path train. I was about two blocks away, and a disheveled black man, who looked younger than me, probably in his fourties, stopped by the car window with his change cup in tow. I tried to avoid his glance – thinking that the light was about to change, but I gave in and looked in his direction. He approached the window, and I felt obligated to roll it down, to see what he had to say. He smiled and shook his cup, – which I guess was the universal sign for donations to his charity. As I dropped some quarters in the cup, I felt that I should at least make sure my money would be used responsibly. I asked him, “what are you going to use it for?”. He said “sometin’ to eat, sometin’ to drink and pickit”. I let out a loud sigh, and told him that was too much information. If he had stopped after “something to eat” then I would have felt good. But he said “drink”, did that mean a soda or “Old Englishe 800?”. And “pickit” as the third option?, – that was totally unacceptable. I could gamble away my own money. But alas, the stoplight changed – and our random encounter came to an end. As I drove away, I shrugged my shoulders, shook my head and muttered “spend it wisely my friend”.
P..S. I share this experience to point out that we should “help others” who are less fortunate than us, but we should do it responsibly, – on a case by case basis. It can be annoying, I admit, but as we train ourselves to move past our discomfort and focus on the individuals humanity, we ourselves become better people. And just in case you misinterpreted my story, thinking that it was racist because I mentioned that the man was black, – let me assure you that detail was just a statement of fact – and not a stereotypical suggestion that only black people are in need of help. For I also am black. We need each other. So let’s commit to taking small steps to see each others humanity as we collectively “help each other” evolve into a socially conscious society that ultimately desires to better save our planet.
I was reminded of an incident that happened to me in the late sixties, (yeah, I was around then). We were participating in a protest/sit-in at my high school and we were advocating for a more inclusive curriculum and teacher hiring practices. The president of the high school encountered the protest participants with the often stated question, “What do you people want?”.
